Barack Obama said raising a son would have been harder due to his own lack of a father figure and said he might have been “more judgmental.”
Barack Obama opened up about fatherhood and personal shortcomings during a revealing conversation on Michelle Obama‘s podcast, admitting he’s thankful he didn’t have to raise a son because he believes it would have been “more difficult.”
The former president, now 63, joined his wife on her show, Michelle Obama: The Light Podcast, where he reflected on parenting their daughters, Malia, 27, and Sasha, 24, and why he’s relieved they never had a son.
“I think we did a pretty good job of raising our girls, but I’ve said often that I think I would have had more difficulty raising a son,” Barack Obama said. Michelle, 61, didn’t hesitate to back him up, replying, “I agree.”
Obama explained that his concern wasn’t about discipline or expectations—it was empathy. “I think I might’ve been more judgmental, harder,” he admitted.
He also pointed to his own upbringing, which lacked a consistent male role model.
“I would’ve tried to—I’d like to think I would have been more self-aware enough to combat that,” he said. “But I just think father-son relationships, for me, particularly if I don’t have a dad around to show it to me, might’ve been more difficult.”
Obama’s father, Barack Obama Sr., was largely absent from his life.
In a 2021 Instagram post, the former president wrote, “I didn’t really know my father—he left my mother and me when I was two years old, and only traveled from Kenya to visit us once, when I was ten. That trip was the first and last I saw of him; after that, I heard from him only through the occasional letter.”
The episode adds another layer to Obama’s long-standing reflections on fatherhood, identity and the emotional gaps left by his father’s absence. The podcast was released in 2024.
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